Growing Pains

So last week was Sophie's first official day of school. It entailed Mister Och and I attending a forty-five minute intro session with her so she can see her classroom, her teacher, and the rest of the class. The rest of the week, there were no other classes held as it was individual skills assessment time. Soph was given an appointment time, as did the other students, and was tested by the teacher on a one-on-one basis. Today was the official WHOLE day of class...the one in which mother hens were not allowed in the classroom with their chickities. Because of the weeklong prelude to this day, I had no anxiety about it, and therefore escorted my boo utterly unprepared.

I had allowed her to make her own decisions about her attire today (the only thing I insisted on was that she had a good healthy intake of food). She opted to bypass a bath, explaining to her momma that she'll probably be sweaty from the playground and so she'll need to take her bath afterwards. She then requested her hair be put up in pigtails because she didn't want to go to school with bedhead. She picked out her outfit, even going as far as stepping outside to gauge the weather. Then, she put her first school project in her backpack and was ready to go.

As she stood there in line with the other newbie students, in the practical little outift and hairstyle she selected, I watched her take a hold of Liv's hand and say, "Now, Livy, I'm going there by myself. You can't come in with me. You need to stay with mom and take a nap, okay?"
Liv had looked up at her big sis with total adoration and nodded as if she understood.

I started to feel a little flutter in my stomach right about then, and it startled me somewhat. What's the big deal, right? Then her teacher herded the line in towards the kindergarten hallway. As she neared the entrance, the tighter the knot in my throat felt. And when she spun around suddenly towards me, I half expected her to look slightly panicked. Instead, she beamed her confident sun-shiney smile and blew me a kiss. She turned right around and headed into her elementary days with a bounce in her step.

Oh, boy, did that get me. I rushed back to the parking lot, plastering this smile on my face, passing all the other mothers chattering about how relieved they are now minus one and how much easier would it be to perform errands. Liv, started whirling around in my arms then, looking for something, and near tears asked, "Where's my girl? Where's my girl? Where's my Sophie?"

I buckled her up as fast as I could and got in the driver's seat and just cried my eyes out.